Manila: December 31, 1999

How cozy Erap and GMA were then. Could it be that the years since then were so cursed because Bro. Mike led the invocation into the new millenium? I wonder if in the year 3000, they'd still be using that discotastic version of Auld Lang Syne.

Notable Pinoys Who Died in 2008

A list of some famous or distinguished Filipinos who died in 2008.

• Eduardo Hontiveros, S.J., 84, Jesuit priest and musician. Composer of several popular Filipino liturgical hymns, was dubbed as the Father of Filipino Liturgical Music. Compositions include Papuri sa Diyos, Ama Namin and Pananagutan. (Jan. 15)
• Crisologo Abines, 60, politician. Congressman representing the 2nd District of Cebu from 1987 to 1998, Cebu chairman for the United Opposition in 2007 (Jan. 28)
  

• Billy Balbastro, 67, lawyer and entertainment columnist. Wrote for Abante and Abante Tonight, president of the Philippine Movie Press Club from 1982 to 1985. Host of Showtime with Billy on DZMM (Feb. 2)
  
• Pedro Baban, 93, Army general and World War II veteran. The first Igorot to be promoted to General of the Armed Forces of the Philippines (Feb. 2)
  
• Larry Cruz, 66, journalist and restaurateur. Through his LJC Restaurant Group, opened among others Café Adriatico, Cafe Havana, Bistro Remedios, and Abe, named after his father, the writer E. Aguilar Cruz. Former publisher, Metro Magazine (Feb. 4)
  
• Stella Goldenberg Brimo, 96, classical pianist and professor. Member of the Goldenberg clan prominent in pre-war Manila society. Soloist of the Manila Symphony Orchestra. First dean, and later Dean Emeritus of University of Santo Tomas Conservatory of Music. Retired to Quebec. (Feb. 6)
  
• Victor Dominguez, 72, politician, congressman representing the Lone District of Mountain Province from 1987 to 1988; 2004 until his death. (Feb. 8)
  
• Tino Reynoso, 62, Philippine Basketball Association player from 1975 to 1980. Played for Toyota, Utex, Seven Up and Mariwasa, brother of Big Boy Reynoso. (Feb. 29)
  

• Carol Varga, 79, actress frequently in villainous roles. 1954 FAMAS Best Supporting Actress for Guwapo, best known as the villain in 1953 film version of Dyesebel (Mar. 4)
  
• Joseph Marañon, 73, politician, governor of Negros Occidental from 2001 until his death (Mar. 13)
  
• Rafael Recto, 76, politician, Member of Parliament from 1984 to 1986, prominent Marcos loyalist after EDSA revolution, son of one senator (Claro) and father of another (Ralph). Competed in two Olympics in shooting. (Mar. 17)
  
• Chito Madrigal-Collantes, 86, socialite and businesswoman who also dabbled in acting and TV hosting, well-known for philantrophic activities. Her death led to a bitter battle over her estate involving her niece, Sen. Jamby Madrigal. (Mar. 25)
  
• Toti Fuentes, 55, jazz pianist based in the U.S. since 1978. Recorded and performed with such American notables as Aretha Franklin, Natalie Cole and Julie Fordham, as well as with Pilita Corrales and Apo Hiking Society. Also a composer. (Mar. 27)
  
• Nemesio Prudente, 81, educator and political prisoner. Longtime president of Polytechnic University of the Philippines. Imprisoned during Marcos administration, survived two assassination attempts during Aquino administration. (Mar. 28)
  
• Venicio Escolin, 87, Associate Justice of the Supreme Court of the Philippines from 1981 to 1986. Longtime law professor at the Ateneo School of Law (Mar. 29)
  

• Myra Lopez, 37, news executive. Chairperson of the board of BizNews Asia magazine. Daughter of journalist Tony Lopez. (Apr. 1)
  
• Luis "Golem" Silverio, 71, golfer. Arguably the best amateur Filipino golfer to date. Winner of the 1966 Philippine Open, played in two U.S. Masters tournaments in Atlanta, Georgia. Won seven individual titles in Putra Cup campaigns (Apr. 7)
  
• Olivia Cenizal, 81, film actress most famous in the 1950s. Twice nominated for the FAMAS Best Actress award. (Apr. 14)
  
• Lucia "Aling Lucing" Cunanan, 80, Pampanga-based cook credited with first popularizing sisig in the 1970s. Dubbed as the Sisig Queen, established the "Aling Lucing" restaurants. Her husband was tagged as the main suspect for her murder. (Apr. 16)
  
• Lou Salvador, Jr., 66, film actor. 1950s matinee idol tagged as the "James Dean of the Philippines". In several films directed by his father, Lou Salvador. (Apr. 19.)
• Loreto Paras-Sulit, 99, author. Among the first noted Filipino writers of short fiction in English. Most productive literary period from 1927 to 1937. Later served for several decades as a ranking official of the Philippine National Red Cross (Apr. 23)

• Jose Feria, 91, Associate Justice of the Supreme Court of the Philippines from 1981 to 1986. Author of several noted law books, Former dean of the UST Faculty of Law. Delegate to 1971 Constitutional Convention (May 8)
  
• Henry Canoy, 84, businessman and media mogul. Established Cagayan de Oro's first radio station in 1952, his network of stations soon grew into the Radio Mindanao Network (May 16)
  
• Al Aboitiz, 48, businessman. Member of the Aboitiz clan, executive of several family-owned businesses, including as COO of the Davao Light and Power Company. Found dead in his bedroom from a gunshot wound to the head (May 17).
  
• Crispin Beltran, 75, labor leader and politician. Former cabbie who became head of the Kilusang Mayo Uno, elected to Congress as a party-list congressman in 2001. Detained on rebellion charges in 2006 later voided by the Supreme Court. Died from an accidental fall. (May 20)
  
• Dommy Ursua, 72, flyweight boxer massively popular in the 1950s. Nicknamed "Toy Bulldog", twice contended for a world title while cheered on by Philippine presidents. Died in abject poverty. (May 25)
  
• Dolly Aglay-Elona, 40, journalist. Financial correspondent for the Philippine Star and Reuters (May 26)
  
• Dante David, better known as Howlin' Dave, 52, radio DJ. Most associated with DZRJ, credited with popularizing Pinoy rock in the 1970s, as well as new wave and punk rock in the 1980s. Hailed by Pepe Smith as "the best rock DJ the Philippines ever had". (May 26)
  
• Romeo Brawner, 72, jurist and Commission on Elections Commissioner. Served 10 years at the Court of Appeals, eventually becoming Presiding Justice. Appointed to the COMELEC in 2005, served briefly as acting Chairman shortly before his death (May 29)
  

• Rudy Fernandez, 56, actor. Among the most popular action film stars of the 1970s and 1980s, twice named FAMAS best actor. Starred in several hit biopics, including Huwag Bitayin si Baby Ama and Markang Bungo. Unsuccessfully ran in 2001 mayoral race in Quezon City. Died after a very public battle with cancer. (June 7)
  
• Danilo Lagbas, 56, politician. Representative from the First District of Misamis Oriental from 2004 until his death. (June 8)
  

• Abbo de la Cruz, 55, film actor and director. Under the name 'Rico Mambo', directed such films as Totoy Mola (July 22)
  
• Gilbert Perez, 48, TV and film director. Frequently associated with ABS-CBN, for which he directed several drama and fantasy series. Also directed the films Jologs, Dreamboy, and Supah Papalicious for Star Cinema. (July 16)
  
• Gilbert Perez, 76, fashion designer and newspaper columnist. Said to be a favorite of Imelda Marcos and Chona Kasten. Wrote the "Manila at Large" column for the Philippine Daily Inquirer for 18 years until his death. (July 22)
  

• Jose Blanco, 76, painter. Noted folk artist from Angono. Favored murals and distinguished for his pastoral scenes. A nominee for National Artist. (Aug. 14)
  
• Lucrecia Kasilag, 90, composer. Popularly known as Tita King, her musical compositions were noted for fusing Eastern and Western elements. Longtime president of the Cultural Center of the Philippines, named as National Artist for Music in 1989. (Aug. 16)
  
• Felipe Natanio, better known as Mang Pandoy, 63, street vendor who shot to fame after being featured in a televised debate during the 1992 presidential campaign as the face of poverty. Later hosted his own TV show Ang Pandayan ni Mang Pandoy, died in poverty (Aug. 28)
  
• Zorayda Sanchez, 57, TV and film comedian. Became famous in the 1980s after she parlayed her homely looks for comedic effects. A mainstay of Going Bananas and of Regal film comedies. Later dabbled in journalism. (Aug. 28)
  

• Fidela "Tiya Dely" Magpayo, 87, radio host whose career lasted 68 years. Dubbed "The First Lady of Radio", credited for popularizing Filipino music in the 1940s. Later best known for her on-air advice show on DZMM and DZRH. An active broadcaster until the end of her life, died several days after suffering a stroke while on air. (Sept. 1)
  
• Pacita Madrigal Warns Gonzalez, 93, socialite and politician. Won election to the Senate in 1955 as the second ever woman Senator and the first female to top the senatorial elections. Career derailed by scandal, defeated for re-election in 1961. Sister of Chito Madrigal-Collantes, who died in March. (Sept. 12)
  
• Cirio H. Santiago, 72, film director. Five-decade long directing career peaked in the 1970s and 1980s with a string of English-language films in association with Roger Corman, Jonathan Demme and other Hollywood notables. Idolized by Quentin Tarantino, who based some characters from the Kill Bill series from Santiago's films. (Sept. 26)
  

• Khryss Adalia, 62, film and television director. Mostly active in television work for GMA Network, also an occasional actor. (Oct. 13)
  
• Alfredo Evangelista, 82, archaeologist. Credited with discovering in 1989 the Laguna Copper Plate Inscription, the oldest writing ever found in the Philippines, as well as the 5,800 year old burial site in Duyong Cave, Palawan. Former head of the Anthropology Division of the National Museum, which he would also serve as its Deputy Director. (Oct. 18)
  
• Armando Manalo, 88, writer and diplomat. Short-story writer beginning in the 1950s, later joined the diplomatic corps. Essayist and columnist for publications such as the Philippine Free Press, the Manila Chronicle, the Manila Times and the Manila Standard. (Oct. 28)
  

• Butch Cleofe, 58, lawyer. Longtime chief legal counsel and corporate secretary of the Philippine Basketball Association. (Nov. 16)
  
• Eulogio Borres, Sr., 91, politician. The longest serving mayor of Cebu City, from 1963 to 1966 and from 1968 to 1979. Active in the political opposition against the Marcos regime. (Nov. 19)
  
• Armand Fabella, educator and businessman. Secretary of Education of the Philippines from 1992 to 1994. Longtime president of the family-owned Jose Rizal University. Member of the Board of Directors of UCPB and PCIB banks and other corporations. (Nov. 27)
  

• Manuel Yan, 88, army general and diplomat. AFP Chief of Staff at age 48, the youngest ever to serve that post. Served 21 years as a diplomat, later becoming Undersecretary for Foreign Affairs. Credited with negotiating the 1996 peace treaty with Nur Misuari's MNLF. Grandfather of matinee idol Rico Yan, whom he outlived. (Dec. 4)
  
• Marky Cielo, 20, actor and dancer. Of Igorot descent, came to fame in 2006 as the winner of the GMA talent competition StarStruck. Starred in several GMA tv series, including Zaido: Pulis Pangkalawakan. Cause of death reportedly yet unrevealed, though initially reported to have died in his sleep. (Dec. 7)
  
• Didith Reyes, 60, singer. Called the "Jukebox Queen" in the 1970s, famous for her sultry voice and temperamental personality. In a notorious incident, once accidentally exposed her breast during a live television performance. Won the Gold Prize and Best Performer award in the 1977 Tokyo Music Festival. (Dec. 10)
  
• Bobi Valenzuela, art curator. Best known as the influential curator of Hiraya Gallery, staged several important art exhibitions in the 1980s and 1990s. (Dec. 12)
  
• Guillermo Cua, 58, accountant and politician. Party-list congressman for Coop-NATCO from 2004 until his death. Chairperson of the Committee on People's Participation (Dec. 17)
  
• Narciso Bernardo, 71, basketball legend. Named in 1998 to the All-Time Mythical Five of Philippine Basketball by the PBA. Played in four Philippine Olympic basketball teams from 1960 to 1972. Superstar guard in the MICAA in the 1960s. Later elected as Mandaluyong City councilor. (Dec. 23)
  
• Ricardo Manapat, 55, author. Anti-Marcos activist, best known for his expose on crony capitalism, Some Are Smarter than Others. Director of the National Archives during Ramos and Arroyo administrations, made news in 2004 when he revealed controversial and highly questionable documents challenging the citizenship of Fernando Poe, Jr. (Dec. 24)
  

On What It Takes

In 1976, the American Secretary of Agriculture, Earl Butz, was on a plane together with Pat Boone (!), Sonny Bono (!) and lawyer John Dean. The ever-earnest Boone asked the Republican Butz why his party had difficulty in attracting African-Americans. Mr. Butz replied,  "the only thing the coloreds are looking for in life are tight pussy, loose shoes, and a warm place to shit." Dean published Butz's remark in Rolling Stone, and within days, President Gerald Ford fired Butz. 

In 2004, the British Home Secretary, David Blunkett, resigned after it was revealed that he had misused his office to speed up the visa of his mistress's nanny. Blunkett was much admired as he was articulate, effective, and blind from birth. Still, he lost his job.

In 1962, the British Defense Secretary, John Profumo, had an extra-marital relationship with a model that lasted only a few weeks. After Profumo admitted to lying to Parliament about the affair, he resigned, and the lingering effects of the scandal helped defeat Profumo's Conservatives in the following election. 

In 2007, two Thai cabinet members offered to resign after it was revealed that they held shares in excess of 5% contrary to the Thai anti-graft law. Also in 2007, Japan's Agriculture Secretary was embroiled in a scandal over suspicious bookkeeping practices. He didn't resign. He killed himself. 

Yesterday, the Secretary of the Department of Agrarian Reform of the Philippines and his son, a Lanao del Sur town mayor, were accused of beating up a 14-year old boy and his father. In a golf course. The impulse to gain wealth through improper means, though indefensible, is still somewhat human. So is the need to stretch your loins outside the marital bond. Beating up a child is just comic-book evil. 

Hallelujah -- What the Hell?!

Those conversant with all things Love Actually may be vaguely familiar with that peculiarly British obsession as to which song is top of the UK pop charts come Christmas day (remember the Bill Nighy subplot with his wretched holiday cover of Love is All Around?) The top spot has been held by such musical luminaries as the Spice Girls (thrice) and Bob the Builder, although the choices can be sometimes eccentric. I myself first became particularly conscious of the tradition when in 2003, the 20-year old Tears for Fears single Mad World -- the more literal but probably more arresting cover sung by Gary Jules and featured in the Donnie Darko soundtrack -- unexpectedly topped the Christmas charts. 

The last few years, the UK Christmas charts have been dominated by reality TV winners, and this year is no exception. The artist is Alexandra Burke, winner of The X Factor Season 5, and the song is yet another cover, the rapaciously ubiquitous Hallelujah.

 

I guess its heartening to see a popular version by a female, though Ms. Burke's cover, to say the least, lacks the wink-wink slyness of Leonard Cohen's original, or the Irish fatalism of Jeff Buckley's insanely popular take. But the hitherto unknown Hallelujah irritation factor has increased exponentially with its growing usage as shorthand emotion for anything remotely connected with death, sorrow, angst or spiritual brooding. So to save Hallelujah, the Brits should disqualify Ms. Burke's version and elevate the Number 2 song instead.

So what placed second in this year's UK Christmas charts? Oh, this one:

Without Irony

On Having a Merry Conti's Christmas

We outsource our Noche Buena to Conti's, and I'm a veteran of The Conti's Day Before Christmas, a magical place where everyone practices the virtue of Insistence.

Imagine the RMS Titanic, but full of mostly rich and purely evil Pinoys, and when after it sinks all the passengers are transported to hell, which by the way is bureaucrat-oriented. That's the Conti's December 24th experience. It is bound to be a nightmare when you jampack an establishment only slightly bigger than The Black Hole of Calcutta with a horde of middle-aged rich people who have never suffered the indignity of lining up before. These people get feisty. They pull rank -- few other restaurants impel its patrons to volunteer, in loud unhesitant voices, the professions that they or their burly husbands practice. 

This year, I made sure to be there by 8am, so the lines were only 50 odd people long. The pre-ordered viands were immediately ready, but I had to line up at first instance to order the pastries. The process only took around 30 minutes (8am after all), but it was proving too much to a stout sixtyish lady beside me (a doctor she was, as she loudly announced while on her cell phone). She started squirming in fashion uncomfortable for her and me, and finally asked me if I could reserve her seat. I told her I did not mind, but that I expected my number to be called within minutes at which point I could not look after her place. She sighed at me with disgust, then wiggled some more before dashing off to the bathroom. My number was called immediately after, so off I went to pick up my order and leave the strongly-accented cacophony to have a proper breakfast at Jollibee. I never saw that lady again. 

Credit though to the staff of Conti's. They plan the logistics of their lines with the insight and precision expected from whatever college course they teach on the anatomy of preparing for long lines. And I really pity their service staff -- spending their Christmas eve being screamed at rich people, many of whom never had a day of manual labor in their lives. Come the revolution...

Anyway, whatever your beliefs and dispositions for the day, have a happy Christmas and enjoy this treat:

New Rules of Procedure on Corporate Rehabilitation

The Supreme Court of the Philippines recently promulgated a new Rules of Procedure on Corporate Rehabilitation. (A.M. No. 00-8-10-SC, 2 December 2008) These Rules supplant the Interim Rules on Corporate Rehabilitation enacted earlier this decade. Among the features of the new rules are creditor-initiated rehabilitation, pre-negotiated rehabilitation, and recognition of foreign rehab proceedings.

The Rules take effect on 16 January 2009. A copy of the Rules (PDF format) available at the Supreme Court website.

Barack Obama Na-impatso; Iniligtas ni Gloria Macapagal Arroyo (Updated 1.25.09)

The Barack Obama dyspepsia commercial for Motilium, which I suspect will be a YouTube hit. Featuring Ate Glow as Gloria Macapagal Arroyo.

I don't know who "essays" the role of Obama, but he has been featured in some popular forwarded e-mails here in Manila. Better than Fred Armisen, I say. Pics below from those e-mails.

UPDATE (1.25.09) His name is Ilham Anas, 34, an Indonesian photographer. The BBC has a profile on him and notes his rising popularity.

Remember the MV Doña Paz

21 years ago this day, the worst peacetime sea tragedy in history took place along the Tablas Strait off Marinduque in the Philippines. An estimated 4,000+ people died when the MV Doña Paz caught fire and sunk after it collided with a small oil tanker, the MT Vector. The Doña Paz, which was built for only about 1,500 passengers, was severely overcrowded though findings later twice affirmed by the Philippine Supreme Court held that it was the Vector which was at fault for the collision. 

Nearly three times as many people died on the Doña Paz than on 9-11. The anniversary though has left nary a blip in the local print media this year or in the past several years. As far as I know, there is no memorial in remembrance of the Doña Paz even while an entire district in Quezon City commemorates 22 well-to-do boy scouts killed in a plane crash in 1963. (Their main memorial lies just meters away from the abandoned site of Ozone Disco, where in 1995, 162 less well-to-do youths were killed in the worst fire in Philippine history.) 

I guess the pain of the hundreds if not thousands of children orphaned 21 years ago is grief enough without having to coerce the whole nation to share the burden. But the choice to forget the Doña Paz would be more defensible if we have absorbed the lessons of the tragedy so as to ensure it does not happen again. True, the larger passenger ferries are no longer as spectacularly overcrowded as the Doña Paz was. However, as revealed by the illicit endosulfan cargo aboard the ill-fated MV Princess of the Stars, there remains a dangerous laxity in the enforcement of our maritime safety rules and regulations.

Local news archives don't go as far back as 1987, but the New York Times does. Here are some of the Times' reports on the Doña Paz back in the day.

• 1,500 Are Feared Lost as Two Ships Collide and Sink Near Philippines
  
• Searchers Find No Trace of 1,500 From 2 Ships Sunk in Philippines 
  
• It's Gloom And Glitter For Manila
  

16 December 2008: The Most Amazing Moment in The Price is Right History

I smell something off. If I were Drew Carey, I would have hysterically jumped up and down screaming "Exactly right!! Exactly right!!" until the floorboards beneath comically gave way. It seems pretty impossible to be there and not give a shit, which appears to be Mr. Carey's reaction of choice. In fact, Mr. Carey gives off the vibe of knowing the fix was in, of having waged the valiant day-long fight against the fix, and lost. Or it could simply be, as one YouTube commenter put it, "i think drew had to take a shit". 

See for yourself. Whatever the context, simply amazing.

Blatantly Untrue Anecdotes Featuring International Celebrities and The Spirit of Christmas

One dark and stormy Christmas Eve, the President of Ghana Kwame Nkrumah, the Chilean poet Pablo Neruda and the Filipino actress Rosa Rosal shared a cabin aboard the Orient Express. Over an improvised cocktail of eggnog and malt liquor, they discussed their personal sentiments on Christmas.

"Christmas is nothing but Western imperialism wrapped in tinsel!", decried Nkrumah, twirling his Lenin Peace Prize around his middle finger. "A devious scheme to supplant native altruistic traditions with cold December-specific market-determined allocation of resources!"

"Christmas is nothing but opium dipped in a fondue of the richest Dutch and Belgian chocolates!", denounced Neruda as he spit-shined his Lenin Peace Prize. "A confectionery laced with amnesia to cloud the minds of the masses from their desultory state of oppression!"

Aghast at these heresies uttered that oh holy night, Rosa Rosal betrayed her fangs and lunged for the jugular veins of her traveling companions. After the two had been thoroughly drained, she capped the night by licking the dribbles of blood that had splattered onto their respective Lenin Peace Prizes. She later donated the regurgitated blood to a child in need who would grow up to be Mat Ranillo the Third.

*** *** ***

Once on the road from Jerusalem to Jericho, the Russian pianist Sergei Rachmaninoff and the American actor Harry Hamlin were conversing about life, love, and the Japanese craft of bonsai. They sighted a decrepit beggar swarmed by locusts and bees, her breath reeking of decades-old vermouth, her foot putrid after a catastrophic failed manicure.

Rachmaninoff sneered, "I will not lift any of my insanely long fingers to assist that virago."

"Why Sergei, that's heartless!", countered Hamlin. "Heartless?!", replied a suddenly inspired Rachmaninoff, who then whipped out his piano and played an instantly composed symphony that made even the scorpions swoon. "Heart is art, and I'm so full of it.", said Sergei as he took a bow for some passing Bedouins who were amazed at the quality of busking so far off a major urban center.

"I don't know Sergei. What good is art if it cannot be shared with society's less fortunate," muttered Hamlin as Rachmaninoff was being lifted and carried away by a gaggle of overeager sophomores from the Jerusalem Academy of Music and Dance. The old beggar beamed as Hamlin approached her with a fistful of shekels and a loaf of bread. "Forgive me, I had unthinkingly leavened the bread earlier this morning not knowing I would encounter you tonight", said an apologetic Hamlin to the beggar.

"Oh little prince from Hollywood, you have shown me much kindness!!", drawled the beggar. She was suddenly enveloped by a starburst of red white and blue, and the desert air filled with the distinct chemical odor of sparklers. When the smoke had cleared, Hamlin was surprised to see that the ugly little beggar had turned into Santa Claus. "Ho ho ho!", boomed Santa in a booming voice that seismologists later believed had caused a minor avalanche along the faraway Khyber Pass. "Harry Hamlin, for your kindness, you shall receive the gift of an eternal Christmas!" Santa grabbed a passing cobra which stiffened into a staff, then waved it at Hamlin, who turned into a reindeer whose red nose only semi-sparkled. "Do not worry," said Santa to an obviously worried reindeer Hamlin, "with a few years of practice and a soy diet, it'll shine bright alright!"

*** *** ***

At the height of their illicit, improbable affair, Winston Churchill and young Ayn Rand professed to celebrate the most meaningful of Christmases. Rand desired to gift her lover with a golden chain to complement Winston's smelly pocket watch, which he claimed belonged to his great-grandfather who bought it from a little general store in Knoxville, Tennessee then passed it to his grandfather who passed it to his father who passed it on to him.

Sadly, the deeply impoverished Rand could not afford to buy the golden chain. She confided in the crooner Harry Connick, Jr. who told her, "shave off your hair, and I'll give you 50 bucks for it so you can buy your golden chain." "What the hell do you need my hair for?", asked Rand."It's a N'awlins thing" replied Harry. "Everyone there walks around carrying other people's hair." Bereft of choices, Rand started to cut off her hair using her mother's diamond-crusted scissors which she acknowledged but in retrospect she should have sold off instead.

On crisp chilly Christmas morn at their rendezvous point at Kings Cross station, Rand giggled as she dangled a golden chain before his eyes. "Merry Christmas Winnie! Look what I got you!"

"Yes, yes. Luv, about that Persis Khambatta look..."

"Oh Winnie. In order I could buy that chain, I had to sell my hair. There was this American, a warlock I believe, and he was interested..."

"Bugger! You have those scissors..."

"Yes Winnie, I know, I realized that too late..."

"Diamonds aside, they were a ghastly-looking..."

"I do not care to discuss the scissors further, Winston!" Churchill uncharacteristically failed to think of a retort worthy of Bartlett's. He instead reached into his pocket. "For you, luv."

"A necktie?... A necktie, Winston?!... A necktie!!... Tell me, do you think me mannish in looks?"

"Have you ever looked yourself in the mirror, luv?" Rand glanced at her reflection at the windows of a passing train and conceded the point. Still, she articulated:

"Winston, I'm deeply deeply disappointed in you."

Chastened and reluctantly cognizant of her supreme sacrifice, Churchill showed up at Rand's flat the following day. "A proper and wittily appropriate Yuletide gift for you luv," he explained as he handed to her rare tickets to the sold-out Broadway rock musical Hair. They went to see the show that night, but Churchill walked out as the first act curtain dropped. "Jungle noise! Kids' music these days is nothing but bloody jungle noise!" At that point, Rand knew the affair was no longer tenable and she memorably ended it amidst the aftermath of a Zeppellin air raid. Embittered, she went on to write The Fountainhead and Atlas Shrugged, forever ruining thousands of Christmas dinner conversations.

Surprisingly Hilarious Headline From People Magazine

Pacquiao v. Leno: The Most Insane Pacquiao Article Yet

Who is Ken Judah Freed  of The Examiner and why is he proposing that Manny Pacquiao be signed by NBC to host his own shows on American network TV five nights a week? He makes the suggestion here, in a reaction to the news that Jay Leno, post-Tonight Show, will be hosting a new daily talk show (working title: "Fuck You, Conan"). 

The idea, of course, is as insane as Saturday Night Live with Howard Cosell, even though Mr. Pacquiao is naturally funnier and more charismatic than Mr. Leno. (Then again, so is Time Magazine's 2006 Person of the Year) Unless Manny promises to knock out a special guest star every episode, his appeal as a host will be of the William Hung/quasi-racist variety. 

Equally specious is the claim in Mr. Freed's article that "[a]s any Internet search engine can tell you, Manny Pacquiao is attracting as many or more hits than any other sports celebrity in recent memory. He may be the leading object of admiration and lust." Sentences out of the stylebook of the Philippine Daily Inquirer. 

If American entertainment executives are truly interested in fashioning Mr. Pacquiao into the Ryan Seacrest of the Orient, they be warned. 

(In the meantime, if you get a kick from an American squelching Pinoy pride in Mr. Pacquiao, read here.)

Books Make Great Gifts...

...because you will be giving some of your money to some of these people:

"This Is Spinal Tap" Star Might Replace Hillary Clinton in U.S. Senate

With Hillary Clinton's appointment as United States Secretary of State, the former U.S. First Lady's seat in the United States Senate will be vacant. It falls upon New York Governor David Patterson to appoint a replacement. The most talked about candidate has been Caroline Kennedy, only surviving child of Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis from her first marriage. Yet New York Magaine reports on the emergence of another plausible female candidate:

Fran Drescher wants to replace Hillary Clinton in the Senate. She says she’s qualified. “I’ve just been given the appointment of U.S. diplomat,” she said at a party for Le Cirque: A Table in Heaven at that restaurant on December 3. “My title is public diplomacy envoy for women’s health issues, and I just got back from a four-country European tour of duty. I believe next I’ll be sent to the Middle East.”

More details here. 

Ring Magazine Salivates Over Pacquiao

Two links to articles from the esteemed The Ring Magazine. One dares posit that Mr. Pacquiao just may be one of the greatest boxers of all time (i.e., Ali territory). The other exults in the local color at a Pacquiao-De La Hoya screening at an Angeles City tricycle stand. 

Avoiding Blasphemy in Your Lechon Manok Enterprise

There is a branch of Ang Lechon Manok ni Sr. Pedro along Magsaysay Avenue that I glance past by during my daily commute to work, but it was only today, with traffic at a fortuitous standstill, that I absorbed the deeper insights behind that brand name. I had  (as you too probably) assumed the name as "Manok ni San Pedro", since the association of the chicken with St. Peter is nearly axiomatic. But "Sr. Pedro"? That's food for traffic thought.

Turns out that the founder of Ang Lechon Manok ni Sr. Pedro is, fortuitously enough, named Peter -- Senyor Pedro -- thus the literal truth behind that name is vindicated. (And the family has been active in setting up livelihood projects, so kudos to them.) I'd like to think though that the enterprise had originally been named "Ang Lechon Manok ni San Pedro". Easy name recall, nice punning typical of Pinoy eateries. The signs have been painted, the friends and family have been invited for the grand opening. Then the parish priest arrives for the blessing, and que horror he exclaims, kasalanan kainin ang manok ni San Pedro. The owners and the guests gasp as they come to realize the gothic underpinnings behind the seemingly playful name. After all, it is usually taken for granted that most of the animals in the manger were likely roasted and eaten a few years later. Murmur murmur until the white paint comes in, as Sr. Pedro, now the wiser, steps up and announces, hindi makasalanan na kainin ang aking malimnamnam ng mga manok. Cheers and hurrah. 

The greatest insight I did learn relates to the 1980s IBC 13 sitcom Ang Manok ni San Pedro, where as narrated in its immortal theme song, the titular sanctified manok was stolen by Teban from St. Peter and embarked on a career in the cockpits. How many local shows since then have proceeded from so truly subversive a premise.

(Somewhere out there, Lito Pimentel eagerly awaits for the box-office numbers of the forthcoming Iskul Bukol reunion movie so he can successfully pitch his idea for an Ang Manok ni San Pedro film)

The First Filipino To Avenge the Honor of Women

I heartily recommend for your libraries the Filipinos in History series published by the National Historical Institute during the 1990s. It is a five volume set, hardbound but inexpensive, available in the more idiosyncratic bookstores such as Popular Bookstore along Tomas Morato and La Solidaridad in Padre Faura. It features two to three-page biographies of famous Filipinos throughout history, not just the canonical figures as Rizal or Bonifacio, but also more obscure but still fascinating figures outside the political/military scene, such as Olivia Salamanca (1889-1913), a pioneering Filipino doctor. And everything you need to know about Mr. EDSA, Epifanio de los Santos, you'll find in the volume.

The one drawback -- it is poorly written. The problem is less of grammar than of perspective. Consider this sample passage from the entry on Cebu's Rajah Humabon:

On April 28, Magellan was vanquished by another native chieftain, Lapu-Lapu, in the Battle of Mactan. This made Humabon lose faith in the Spaniards and turn him into an avenger - the First Filipino to avenge the honor of women. He hatched a plot to kill all the Spaniards who remained on the island, to avenge their rape of Cebu's women during their entire stay. (italics and capitals not mine)

Even if it were factually accurate that Mr. Humabon were "the First Filipino to avenge the honor of women" (and it most likely is not), that passage still appears to cater to an undiscerning mob. There is little sophistication in most of the biographies in the series. Nevertheless, given that there are no competing texts out in the market, going through the volumes still augments to the sum of human knowledge. A perfect Christmas gift to your stay-at-home retired parents. 

Another Bangungot Celebrity Death

I'm not too familiar with the career of the actor Marky Cielo, who was found dead today at age 20, so I can't offer much by way of assessment other than sadness over the death of somebody so young and in the prime of life. Still, the apparent cause of death -- bangungot -- is an issue that riles me up. I belong to the bangungot demographic -- young Southeast Asian male. Many of you who will read this (including myself) will have personally known someone who had died of bangungot.

This is not the place to look for any intelligent discursives on the nature and cause of bangungot. This instead is a forum for the expression of rage over the fact that there is, as far as I know, little comprehensive scientific research into the "cure" for bangungot, as there is for cancer or AIDS. Until such time when the scientific research into bangungot is actualized and widely publicized, that condition will be left defined in supernatural dimensions, without any effective means for preventing the same. 

Will Matt Groening Now Invite Pacquiao to Guest-Voice on "The Simpsons"?

They did dole out a guest spot for Mr. De la Hoya five years ago...(sorry, no video available)

One Boxing Pundit Correctly Predicted Pacquiao 8th Round TKO

Check out this compilation by Yahoo Sports of predictions by US media "experts"  as to the outcome of the Manny Pacquiao-Oscar De la Hoya fight. Of the 21 experts polled, 17 predicted a De la Hoya victory while only 4 bet on Pacquiao. Those 17 now have balut on their faces after Pacquiao's epic win via TKO at the end of the 8th round. 

Of the 4 who correctly predicted a Pacquiao win, one of them actually accurately forecast an 8th round TKO victory for Mr. Pacquiao. His name is Nick Cafardo, and he writes for the Boston Globe.

I can't locate any article or column by Mr. Cafardo where he made that precise prediction of an 8th round TKO, but here is a preview he wrote of the match. 

And as Mr. Pacquiao enters the stratosphere of international superstardom, let us not forget Pancho Villa, who might have reached their first if not for a toothache. 

Remember the Von Trapp Family Concert the Night They Fled Austria?

MANILA, Philippines - If the Cebu provincial jail has its dancing inmates perform a dance number for the Internet, Davao City will have its jail inmates perform a concert for a cause.

The Catholic Bishops Conference of the Philippines said the Davao City jail inmates hope to be ready to perform at the concert tentatively scheduled on April 4 next year.

An article on the CBCP Web site said Fr. Hermes Sabud, chaplain of the Archdiocesan Commission on Prison Welfare (ACPW), said selected detainees would take part in the concert.

He said the target date of the concert is April 4, 2009 at the CAP Auditorium on Anda Street, Davao City.

From the GMA News website.

Parañaque Shootout: 15 to 17 Dead

Update: Latest this morning from GMANews.TV reports 17 dead, and that three of the robbery gang members had escaped. As was inevitable, the news has also now made the foreign wires.

Earlier: There was an epic shootout in Parañaque City a few hours ago, with reports of between 11 to 14 dead. (DZMM now reports 17) Majority of the dead appear to have been members of robbery gangs (Waray Waray, says DZMM), with at least one police officer and possibly at least three or more bystanders as additional fatalities (including a 7-year old girl, according to DZMM). The incident occurred inside United Parañaque IV subdivision. I don't remember a shootout with that high a body count since the controversial Kuratong Baleleng killings of 1995.

There has been a spate of especially brutal robberies undertaken by criminal gangs this year. While the deaths of the cop and the onlookers are of course to be mourned, it is hard to be sympathetic over the deaths of the others. Still, a full investigation is necessary. Those officers who acted responsibly should also be rewarded, and I'm quite certain that local and police officialdom (if not the public) will be quick to the rush in heaping hallelujahs and medals. But the less popular possibility would be if the shootout was aggravated by the actions of the cops, or steps could have been taken to avoid civilian deaths. Expect an awkward silence if that is revealed, yet the chips should fall where they may. Police enforcement will not improve if reckless behavior remains unpunished.

The Most Important Patient In the History of Brain Science Dies

Remember Drew Barrymore's Lucy from 50 First Dates? Her real-life counterpart was an American white male born in 1926, who lost his ability to form new memories following experimental brain surgery in 1953. His name was Henry Gustav Molaison -- "H.M." as he was famously known in the medical community -- and he was called "the most important patient in the history of brain science". H.M. died yesterday, aged 82. While he could recall events that occurred from 1926 to 1953,  "[f]or the next 55 years, each time he met a friend, each time he ate a meal, each time he walked in the woods, it was as if for the first time." And unlike Drew Barrymore's Lucy, he left no survivors. 

According to the NYT obit, he'd spend part of his day relaxing in front of a television. He'd had probably seen a television set by 1953 so experiencing TV watching on a daily basis in itself may not have been novel. But color TV, wow, I'd erupt in paroxysms of glee everytime I'd turn on the TV set and see the colors (Police Squad! In Color!). 

Try this at home. Pick up a newspaper, a magazine or any other current non-fiction reading material. Before reading it, imagine yourself between 1 to 10 years younger -- like it were 2003 and by some magic you were reading a Newsweek from 2008. What follows is a series of amazements. (Who the hell is this Irish fella named Barack O'bama? Steve Nash became NBA MVP?? Fuck!) It is a useless diversion, but it makes waiting in line at the dentist less tiresome. 

(An acceptable, though more taxing variation of this exercise. Imagine your 2008 self reading a magazine from 2013.  Oscar Best Actor for 2011 Yaphet Kotto?? Fuck!)

August 1, 1996 -- The Day I Discovered the Internet

I'll be the only person in the world for whom Claudette Colbert is inextricably entwined with the copper-wired Internet. I went online for the very first time on 1 August 1996, at a short-lived Internet cafe along Katipunan. Like stout Cortez with eagle eyes I stared at the fresh reports on the death of Claudette Colbert. The news itself was neither shocking nor affecting to me (she was 92 and not a particular favorite of mine), but tangentially memorable because of its association to an activity that barring locked-in syndrome, I would be doing for the rest of my life.

The more emotionally resonant moment of that session came when I somehow chanced upon the campaign website for some American politician running for election to a state assembly. I found myself childishly giddy over the fact that here I was in the Philippines perusing over the resume of somebody of absolutely no relevance to my life or circumstances, or to the lives or circumstances of the people I knew. At the guestbook page, I started to post something to highlight the disconnect, something moronic such as "Hello from faraway Philippines! Hahaha!" I now forget why I ultimately demurred. 

Claudette Colbert is now long gone, as with that Internet cafe along Katipunan and the Ma Mon Luk branch down the road where I proceeded to afterwads. But The Internet Lives!!! Turn turn turn, circle of life, and so on. 

Paalam, Ambassador Kristie Kenney.

Looks like U.S. Ambassador to the Philippines Kristie Kenney, the first woman to hold that post, will be out of a job come January 20, as with all other ambassadors who had been appointed by President Bush. She had a higher profile and friendlier demeanor than many of the previous U.S. ambassadors to Manila. And while she was here, she danced quite a bit. In public.

Click here for another Kenney dance number.

I'm rereading the Washington Post story, and Ms. Kenney may remain with us for a while. The Obama directive apparently applies to "politically-appointed ambassadors", as opposed to who are "foreign service officers", and as stated in her State Department bio, Ms. Kenney has been a career diplomat. Anyway, enjoy the dance numbers linked above.

GMA Network Files Lawsuit vs. TV5

None too surprising news. I had been wondering, ever since the ABC5-Media Prima Berhad deal was announced, if a legal challenge would be posed considering the constitutional provision that says "[t]he ownership and management of mass media shall be limited to citizens of the Philippines, or to corporations, cooperatives or associations, wholly-owned and managed by such citizens." (Section 11[1], Article XVI) MPB Primedia, with whom ABC had partnered with, is itself organized under Philippine law. Yet GMA is apparently invoking the 1936 Anti-Dummy Law, which was designed to prevent foreigners to skirt around laws reserving certain industries to exclusive Filipino ownership and control. 

This case will certainly take years to resolve, but it is well worth keeping tabs on. Apart from affecting the fate of one network alone, its ultimate resolution could change the mass media landscape in the Philippines, especially if a means were sanctioned to allow some indirect foreign participation in the local media market without having to amend the Constitution. 

Facebook a Secret Phisher?

Update: TechCrunch.com, via Washingtonpost.com duly reports on this Facebook phishing brouhaha, which had sent people a-twitter. Apparently the same problem manifested on Safari and even Firefox. It's now been resolved.

Original Post: Problem at Facebook? A few minutes ago, I tried to log onto Facebook and this is what I got:

It had not been five minutes before being confronted by that screen when I had last logged on to Facebook without a glitch. Oddly enough, I'm able to log on fine when using Firefox, but not with Google Chrome. Could it be that Chrome has vastly superior phishing detectors to Firefox or other browsers? Or is it just another manifestation of the mutual dislike between the Google and the Facebook teams?

National Hagiographic (12.3.2008)

Must-Read of the Week -- Vanity Fair's droolingly long, gossip-laden profile of the great Tina Fey (penned by Maureen Dowd). With a Leni Riefenstahl reference to das boot! 

On Choosing a Life-Changing Gift For Your Annual Kris Kringle Activity

Without context, my gift this year to the annual Kris Kringle will seem ambiguously negative -- so context first. At the annual Christmas party staged by my law school class, the gift-giving procedure since 2005 has been to require everybody to bring at least one item valued above a predetermined limit. The gifts are pooled together and displayed on a modest table arrangement. Lots are drawn, and the first person picked selects any item from the table within 20 seconds or so. The next person can either pick another gift from the table, or steal any gift already previously claimed (each gift being tagged with a two-steal maximum). And so on chaos. This barter paradigm is apt for lawyery types since it showcases an exhibition of such skills as pleading, bargaining, deceiving and showing grace despite humiliating reality. 

(The learned ones may shriek, "you ripped that off from The Office Christmas episode where Michael Scott gave an iPod while everyone else brought mittens!" Balderdash I say, in my best Connery brogue. We independently originated this idea without any inkling that it was featured just days earlier in an Emmy Award-winning American sitcom.)

The drawback, for those soaked in the spirit of Christmas for all things December, is the typically generic nature of the gifts swapped under our system. The natural tendency has been to bring presents that are gender-neutral and of broad appeal given the uncertainty of who exactly will be receiving your gift. The bequest may remain a genuine expression of love and affection among friends, but none too effusively lest they cross boundaries untraversed by privately transacted gifts. 

Yesterday, I purchased my gift. It is a tome by Time Magazine's Amanda Ripley entitled The Unthinkable: Who Survives When Disaster Strikes - And How We Can Do Better. According to Oprah:

"Engrossing and lucid … An absorbing study of the psychology and physiology of panic, heroism, and trauma … Facing the truth about the human capacity for risk and disaster turns out to be a lot less scary than staying in the dark."

I snuck a peek. The page I saw told the story of a survivor of the 1994 MS Estonia ferry disaster. As he scrambled to the lifeboats as the roro started sinking, he saw many other passengers utterly paralyzed or otherwise oblivious to doom (one of them continued smoking his cigarette as if nothing was happening). Presumably, the book claims, these passengers were either too shocked by the events, or trapped by a reflex to engage in a final reminiscence about life, family and friends. 

Don't be mistaken that this is disaster porn. The book is a serious exploration of the survival instinct, of actions you should quickly take once caught up in a catastrophe. In cliche-world, this book could save lives, hence its usefulness as an incidentally transcendent gift. It may not exactly be the Potteresque kind of book that transfixes you for hours on end as you wilt away at the nearest Coffee Bean. It likely is best read in fragments -- perfect bathroom distraction -- so as to let each survival tip marinate in your brain in sleep instead of being swept away in panic by a flood of don't-or-else's.

As for me, I'll probably end up being left with a CD or DVD, if I'm lucky.